Guardian
by Randman
Summary: The story of a girl, and her journey to uncover her true self... And the boy who led her... And a few other things...
1. Stillness Disturbed

_Disclaimer:  
Neon Genesis Evangelion and all about it belongs mainly to GAINAX and not us - the creators of this fic. This piece of work incorporates some of the characters and settings of the TV series. The story, here, is ours. Also, everything else that you think belongs to you do. Don't sue!_

Let the weirdness begin. And I say begin, today, as this is only the first chapter: the induction. A bit tame, as you may suspect, but it can only snowball itself.  
At the beginning of each chapter, you will be provided a gauge for how much you can expect of each style of writing I have put in it. There are three elements: Comedy, Drama and Descriptive. This is today's:

Comedy: 15 pt  
Drama: 25 pt  
Descriptive: 60 pt

Anyway, let's just get it going, shall we?

* * *

**Guardian**

_Original Idea by William Wong  
Inspired by Nathan Rawlins  
Written by William Wong_

**Stillness Disturbed**

The sun sparkled smartly through glowing, green leaves, overhead; warming the sweet, pure air; deepening the colors of the world - the blue sky, the creamy pavement, yellows on the road, reds scattered around. It even managed to bolden the subtle blues of Rei as she walked quietly down the sunlit streets. Her pale skin radiated a healthy glow, her albino-blue hair seemed to slightly glitter under the sun, the red bow was as rich as it ever was, her school uniform so clean and proud.  
"Hey, baby, wanna come with m- _Ugh!_"  
And the colorful, unconscious body of a flashy pimp in brilliant pink fur was dragged away to lay in the shadows from the sun.

The never-ceasing summer of Tokyo-3 had no mercy for the season of winter. Yet, even then, the ridiculously over-clad man in red stood outside of the shopping mall in sweltering heat, flinging his yellow bell about, and boisterously called out those three words that would tell anyone unfortunate enough to not have a calender what season it was.  
Indeed, it was that time of year, again: Christmas.

Passing the shopping mall - that rather large, friendly place with shop assistants greeting to everyone _Irasshaimase...! _left, right and center, - Rei made a turn and walked five minutes more to arrive at the dreaded social venue of school.

Though it would probably be surprising to anyone who knew her, Rei hated any place that didn't involve being frightfully alone in a claustrophobically dark corner somewhere with a glass of water, or a large, warm, indoor swimming pool. It's surprising not because she hated it, but rather because she _hated_ it. No one had a clue she was possibly capable of bearing _hate_ towards anything, or even had a _preference_ towards anything, or that she liked indoor _swimming pools_. They just thought she was one of them harmless, mentally ill people - which she partly was, if one defined enjoying being perfectly still for long periods of time a mental illness.

Lunchtime was a drag, as always. Rei never brought any food with her, as always. Partly because she couldn't cook, and partly because take-away would have become too cold by lunchtime, as she had found out in her earlier years.  
This lunchtime was no different.  
This is what Rei often did to pass time during lunch: Sit perfectly still and stare out the window. Besides finding the occasional life-changing book, it was one of the few enjoyments she had discovered during her life on the surface. Had she been a character in an anime, she would've been thought up by some poor, small company trying to struggle back into the limelight by ingeniously having characters be still for long periods of time to save celluloid, and also just as easily win plenty of votes in popularity polls, at the same time - which she probably would have been in some alternate dimension.

Outside the window, Rei watched some students have fun with a ball. The mumbles of the classroom, around her, faded from her mind, and she only heard the sound of the ball being kicked around by the boys. She watched it being knocked from left to right, sent through the air and being hit back with somebody else's forehead.  
Up and down, round and round.  
Left and right, through the frame.

Her fifty-minute trance was cut short by the shatter of the window above her and the ball sailing through. Glass pieces fell dangerously all over Rei as the screams of all the girls wailed in the classroom.

Luckily, due to the laws of mandatory installment of safety-glass in all schools, Rei was not hurt. It was still no reason, however, for the staff of that school to get Rei checked up at the nurse.  
There was a saying in the Japanese culture that stated that only fools caught colds during summer. This immediately fell into disuse after the Second Impact that caused a permanent summer to settle over Japan. Still, it happened that the female school nurse had a cold and was not present on that day (coincidentally, Asuka also had a cold, that day), and Rei was left with the infamous male nurse to check her over.  
"Hey, baby, wanna- _Ugh!_"  
And that was that.

When Rei got back to her classroom, she had found that it was empty, and that all the students were actually relocated to a different room. When Rei turned around, she came face-to-face (in a manner of speaking) with the chest of a male senior student.  
After looking at it for a good ten seconds, she finally realized that it won't go away. She had to resort to looking the man in the eye.

And his eyes weren't bad, either. It seemed like one of those manly eyes that were, at the same time, a glistening dark shade of brown.  
"Hey," he said.  
Rei was anticipating "baby, wanna-" and the big deck after that. But, it didn't come.  
It was then that, to Rei's horror, she realized that she will have to speak for the first time, that day.  
"Yes?"  
"Yeah, hey, you know that Michiko in your class, right?"  
"Yes."  
"Yeah, can you send this to her for me?" He held a folded piece of paper in front of Rei.  
"Yes."  
Rei took the note and walked to the classroom indicated on the notice of her old one.  
To her satisfaction, Rei managed to get away with only having to repeat the same three-lettered word three times (at least in English - "Hai").

No sooner had she leapt over that hurdle, she realized the next one. Getting the note to Michiko, herself. What did Rei know about Michiko? Not a lot, admittedly, but enough to know the whereabouts of her. Typically, where there was Hanako, there was Michiko, for Michiko was the henchman and close friend of Hanako, who followed in the footsteps of her senior, stuck by her, aided her where Hanako needed her and generally was a pet thing. That is, Michiko was in love with her "_senpai_" in the most obviously secretive way that Hanako was completely oblivious to.  
As for Hanako, she was probably the nicest, richest - and therefore most popular, under Asuka - girl student at the school. This presents itself, to Rei, as a challenge because that would mean an indefinitely large group of other girls would be following her around. And more people will mean more trouble for Rei.  
Oh, dear.

Rei turned around to enter the door, and was faced with a crowd - around where Hanako should be - so big, it would be enough to make a brave man sweatdrop. Rei managed to withhold her sweatdrop for the time being.  
Rei was going to have to make her way through this. More people than a J-Pop concert; more shoppers than a Chinese bazaar; more Agent Smiths than a Super Burly Brawl. And Rei was going to have to make her way through in the most polite way possible.  
So, she did.

She soundlessly squeezed her way through this sea of bodies. Not that anyone would hear her if she made a sound. The stifling air around her smelt of diffused teenage girl smells and a truckload of perfume, shampoo and long-lasting deodorant on this particularly humid summer day.  
At some particular last, Rei found herself being thrown right into the eye of the storm; right at the feet of Hanako, who looked down at her with the face of a ten-year-old at a starving, lost puppy.  
That was soon replaced with a smile of amusement and a little sympathy.  
"Rei! So you want to come as well?"

This was unexpected; for the second most popular girl in school to be talking to the most ignored girl in school (if you ignore the regulars who often get knocked out and wake up next, forgetting they tried hitting on her the day previous) in front of everyone, it was most unexpected. Rei looked up at Hanako, then started to stand up. "Come where?"  
"To my place! A Christmas party! Everyone at the school's invited."  
There was a quick burst of more chatter from the girls regarding the party.  
Rei, already standing up, looking at Hanako dead in the eyes with a vague expression, gave a pause as the girls around her chattered. Then, "I am invited?" Her voice was that same, old, quite tone, which seemed to defy the, still, unwritten laws of sound: Hanako and others heard her voice quite clearly over the general chatter, as if the general chatter was quieter than Rei, which it was not.  
"What difference is it with just you around the mansion, anyway?" Hanako joked. Several girls behind Hanako laughed lightly. Funny, but true. "I know _today_'s Christmas day, but it's a Saturday, tomorrow. Are you coming?"

A small, unexplainable thought entered Rei's mind which triggered this subtle response, "We will see."  
And just as quickly, Rei held a note up towards Michiko's general direction. "This is for you."  
Michiko, careful at first, reached and took the note out of Rei's hand. When she next looked up from the note, Rei already disappeared through the crowd, somewhere. Although all the windows were intact and properly closed, there seemed to be a chilling wind sweeping through the classroom which made those who noticed the unexplained disappearance shiver deep inside with uncertainty.  
Uncertainty over both the response from Rei, and the nature of the girl, herself.

Suddenly, as it were, Rei was on her way back to her apartment.  
The sun shone down, as always, now from the other direction. Cicadas chirped their evening hymn. The pimp was no longer lying in the alley-way. A song played faintly from a distance away.  
The song, as superficial as it was, was quite catchy. Dangerously uplifting, disturbingly happy and altogether foreign in language. It was a wonder how it had survived to that day through infecting the minds of little children and being recreated in terrifyingly new ways by the adults the generation after. The song, _Jingle Bells_, was yet to be eradicated from the human world.

The song played as Rei passed that shopping mall:

_Dashing through the snow,  
In a one-horse open sleigh.  
Through the fields we go,  
Laughing all the way!  
Bells on bob-tail ring,  
Making spirits bright.  
What fun it is to ride and sing  
A sleighing song, tonight!_

_Jingle bells! Jingle bells!  
Jingle all the way!  
Oh, what fun  
It is to ride in a  
One-horse open sleigh, Oh!_

And the song carried itself along with Rei in her mind. Playing over and over again, all the way home. Even as Rei removed her shoes and placed her bag away, it carried on, quietly to itself. Even as she walked to her bed to sit on it for a long period of time, it played in her head. And even as night fell behind the curtains, it played.  
It played right through into her sleep.

And for the first time in her life, as she slept with Jingle Bells playing through it, she dreamt.

"_Uta wa ii, ne..._" ("Songs are good...")

* * *

**Next time**:  
Rei has a dream! As she floats about in this state of ambiguity, she ever so subtly begins to lose it! Talks of music, remainders and feistiness all finally amount to nothing as Rei approaches dawn. But what really awaits her at the end of the dream? And who is that boy singing songs in her head?  
It's all on next chapter: The Breaking  
And there will be fan service, too, weirdly enough. 

(Leave a quick review and give this poor author a morale boost. Any comments are welcome... Well, most.)


	2. The Breaking

This chapter, in fact, is basically all exposition, so I felt it necessary to have at least one, major, all-comedy sequence in it, as well as some fan service - (that's right, we get to see Rei nude! Boys, start your saliva glands!). Well, I actually think this chapter is more complicated than that. In writing this chapter, I find that there is at least one very deep and lengthy paragraph in it that may interrupt the flow of the story, which is already shaky.  
I'll leave it for you to decide, though.  
Leave by a review!

Comedy: 35 pt  
Drama: 23 pt  
Descriptive: 42 pt

Have you seen The Phantom of the Opera? (End random thought)

* * *

**The Breaking**

"I'm sorry?"  
"Songs lift up the human spirit and brings joy to mankind. I believe songs are the highest point in the culture that Lilins have created."  
The atmosphere stirred as Rei attempted to come to terms with herself and her surroundings, and that voice. "Who are you?"

Suddenly, an eerie burst of song came through, "_I_- am your _a_-ngel of mu-_sic_...! _Co_-me to me, _a_-ngel of mu- _Ugh!_"  
Rei could not see herself nor make sense of what she sensed around her, but she managed to direct her will into decking that voice.  
"Where is this?"

"_This_," the voice said, rubbing its jaw, "is my domain. Rather, your dream, but currently floating in a dimension which we do not understand."  
"A dream?"  
"Yeah, don't you _dream_...? Oh, yeah,I guess not."

Rei pushed forward into the conversation to gain some meaning into wherever she is.  
"Why am I here?"

The voice then brilliantly executed a short monologue, sounding both intelligent and invulnerable.

"Your life is the sum of a remainder of an unbalanced human mind, inherent to the program of Instrumentality. You are one of a set of many, which, despite my sincerest efforts, I have been unable to contact through your lack of dreams, until now.  
"While it remained a burden, assiduously avoided, it was not unexpected, and thus not beyond a measure of _control_. Which has led _you_, _inexorably_, _here_."

"You still haven't answered my question," Rei shot back.

There was a significantly brief pause. "Quite right. Interesting. That was quicker than the others."

"Damn straight, I am," Rei boasted, suddenly. "After all, I lead with the highest record for staying alive! What'ya gotta know is when to keep your mouth shut. The First only lasted a few years, stupid kid. Hah!" Rei, herself, thenpaused. "Wait... What did I just say?"

"You have minimal self-control in your dreams," the voice explained, "if you didn't know."

Rei ignored what just happened. "Why are _you_ here?"

The voice smiled inaudibly as it replied, "Call me what you want, but I am, as they say, your guardian _angel_."

Rei waited for more.  
"... yes...?"

"I exist with a purpose - I am here to help you. Why? There is no reason. There is no justification for existence. There may be a 'how' but not a 'why'. Things only happen. And so, I happened."  
"Goddam it, answer the question!" Rei's seldom-heard voice managed to sound harsh.  
"My, my, aren't _we_ a little _feisty_ in our dreams?" The voice smiled further. "Wanna see how feisty _I_ can be? _Whoa!_ Hah, you missed!" The voice chuckled after having dodged Rei's decking swing.

Rei cracked her knuckles, looking at the voice with warning; or at least what she thought were her knuckles at where she thought was the voice. This dream was quite sparse in the details. "I will be patching up on my self-defense skills, later. And inevitably, I will kick your ass."  
"Feisty is as feisty does," it spoke, moderately. "But once you get to know me, it'll be _I_ showing _you_ how to get feisty."

"What?"

"Just follow my directions," it said. "See you at dawn..."

And to a certain degree, Rei woke up.

_That, indeed, was an interesting experience. A dream,_ she thought. Rei decided that it would probably be in her best interest to see a psychiatrist, that day. As she rose from her bed and walked to the bathroom, a gush of air seemed to force her front door open, spewing brief, cold morning air into her room. Rei shivered.  
_I left the front door open?_

As she gazed out into the pale, morning light, a piece of mail fluttered through the entrance to her feet. A simple, colored piece of paper. Rei never often bothered to sift through her mail, and it seemed this was one of those unsifted.  
It was a Christmas party initiation.

Rei wondered how Hanako managed to find her address, and indeed, the addresses of everybody else at the school. In any case, the strange coincidence of this particular piece of mail to come fluttering to Rei's feet felt as if it was some kind of nudge from an unseen, supernatural being, somewhere. The party was to start on the evening of Saturday, today. The address was printed clearly on the bottom.  
Still, Rei didn't make a sound to suggest what she thought of it, and simply closed the door shut. She then walked into the bathroom to brush her teeth and have a shower.

That face in the mirror: Her expression was absolutely placid and, yet, evidently tense. A small sternness, or a face that just said, "I'm not in the mood." Her red eyes seem dulled by her expression; her small nose managed to not feel pointy to the touch; her little mouth...  
Fortunately, Rei's oral hygiene was up to scratch. She brushed twice a day. She flossed at night. She had perfectly formed teeth. Her tongue was a healthy shade of pink. Her breath smelt of absolute nothingness, except after dinner when it smelt like pepperoni pizza with no meat (or, at times, well-cooked instant ramen).

Into the shower she went. The shower was running for exactly forty-five seconds prior to her entrance, which was exactly how long it took to reach the right temperature, as she found out and noted long ago. The hot water knob was turned almost exactly to 385 degrees, and the cold water knob 240 degrees. The resulting water temperature was to what Rei estimated as a comfortable thirty-eight and a half degree centigrade. The water pressure was finely balanced between the two vague constants of an acceptable water speed and an acceptable water bill.  
Needless to say, the water was just "perfect" when Rei entered.

And so, standing under the stream of water, cleansing away the day previous, Rei showered.

She never would have expected an intruder to sneak in and and stab her to death with a kitchen knife...

Rei spun around and screamed.  
It began to stab into her body, seemingly a thousand times over.  
Over and over, again.  
Pain.  
Rei spun again, screaming, pressing her chest against the wall, trying somehow to get away.  
But it continued relentlessly.  
Pain.  
Rei's screams became desperate, empty gasps. Her arms flailed helplessly. Finally nearing an end.  
Red fluids scattered itself into the water, below, washing away into a spiral down the drain.  
Pain...  
And it stopped.  
It'd gone away, but Rei had already lost all strength.  
Her chest expanded and contracted slower. She fell against the wall, sliding down and down to the bottom.  
Reaching for something.  
Anything.  
Before...  
She fell.

Nothing but for the sound of pouring water and the dead silence within it could be heard, after that...

The bad plumbing system meant that her new neighbor's toilet was connected to her cold water tap.

And Rei needed to buy a new tub of red shampoo, again.

After that little incident, Rei's expectancy for an intruder to sneak in and and stab her to death with a kitchen knife was non-existent.  
However, an intruder did manage to sneak in, anyway.

"So, are we going to shave?"

Rei screamed again, scrambling to get up, looking for that voice.  
She managed to slip on a bar of soap. She crashed back to the ground.  
Staying where she was, Rei wiped her eyes of water and looked out, again.  
She saw no-one.

"Are we?"

Rei no longer wished to see a psychiatrist, but considered to be immediately admitted into a mental asylum. And so, with that in mind, she spoke for the first time, that day, to no-one. "Shave?"

"Well, yeah," the voice said back. "And this is the day of the party. I can see you need it. We _are_ going to shave, aren't we?"  
Rei remembered. "You!"  
"Yeah, me."  
"Where are you?" Rei glanced around her, crouched in the corner with water smacking continuously onto her head. She looked about like she was expecting a swarm of wasps to come chasing after her. Rei was often most off her guard in the mornings, so she had trouble casually showing off her body like she normally would.  
"Nowhere in particular. Don't worry about me, though, I will just be a voice in your head. Nothing more."  
"Where?"  
"Just around your vicinity. It seems that I won't be able to go away, for the time, being."  
"Why are you here?" Rei's voice quivered, shivering.  
"Do I have to tell you over and over again? There is no reason. There is no justification for existence..."  
"Go away!" Rei was in a sudden hysteria. First the unexplained opening door, then the hot water, then the soap, then this. This was mental breaking-point. Rei could never get the hang of mornings.

She didn't budge from her position. She was prepared to sit in a crouched position like she will have to in the asylum for a long period of time. She was even prepared to rock gently back and forth. The voice then said, reasonably, "Come, now. Neither you nor me can do anything about this, so we just have to deal with it. You stay calm and let me stick around, and I'll... stick around. Sounds fair?"  
Rei's wide eyes were blank. Her respiration was deep and shuddering. She was in some sort of shock.

The voice decided it was time to calm the girl down. "Come, now. Let's get you out, first. Let's pick you up; up we get, now... Turn off the taps... yes, that's it. You can do it... Now step out... yes, good, now wrap this towel around you, and get out the door... Okay, good, come and sit on the chair, alright? This nice, simple, flat chair. Nothing to be worried about, good..."  
Rei's eyes still possessed that empty shock, in there, staring at nothing but whatever was in front of her.  
"Hey, why don't we get you something to drink? Some hot chocolate? Maybe a good instant ramen... My name's Kaworu if, it helps... Let's get you dry, and something to fill your empty stomach... I'd make it for you if I was able to, of course..."

After a particularly successful instant ramen and soothing, hot chocolate; it was already almost midday, and Rei was back to her normal self, or at least as normal as she ever was.  
"So, Rei, now that half the day's already gone, we need you to get going. You've shaved, sure, but don't think that's the only thing you need to do before going to an important event such as a Christmas party, and at a rich girl's mansion with the whole school at that."  
"I don't think I will attend the party."  
"What?" The voice of Kaworu was in disbelief. "I can't believe you don't want to go! Where's that side of you that's adventurous and likes to go party?"

In fact, Rei had grown to despise parties. Firstly, it fit under the category of 'not being frightfully alone in a claustrophobically dark corner somewhere with a glass of water, or a large, warm, indoor swimming pool'. Secondly, it was simply crawling with friendly, hyperactive people just dying to emmerce into conversation with her over her albino features, or alternatively wanting to take her onto the dance floor so they can see how close they can get their bodies to hers until their position becomes classified as something else more unholy than mere dancing. Thirdly, Rei will not have the room to deck them if this becomes the case.  
One may had called this, simply, being a damn bore, but deep down, this was not the case with Rei. The truth was, Rei had grown to despise them because she feared them. Perhaps it was an irrational fear, but the fear was real; it was something that exists integrally within Rei, something that infiltrates into her blood and seeps into every nerve of her body, something that had a grip on her, that took hold of her very core.  
What was this fear, specifically? Fear is never specific. But what Rei may have feared could be said to be shared universally among all people. That is the fear to be lost in the unknown. The one place you could never possibly escape from is yourself. Human minds are the vastest of realms - unmappable labyrinths. So what if it is yourself that has become the unknown? To be lost, forever, in an inescapable world you cannot understand would be the stuff of infinite fear. Rei knew, herself, there was something under the bed, something that has never been let out. No doubt, she did not know what it was, but she did know this: it was herself. To reveal the true, underlying Rei to herself, let alone to others, would be opening Pandora's Box of fear, and terror, and an embodied havoc. The uncertainty of what she may become, and what it may be capable of doing, is what frightens her.  
In the end, the fear in Rei may just be of trivial consequence.  
Perhaps, deep down, whether she thought this or not, she was still just a child.  
An easily scared one.

Rei wondered exactly what this Kaworu even knew about her. "How do you know me?"  
"Well, I don't really. I just know your name: Rei.  
"The first Rei, I never formally met. Cheeky, young girl, I could tell. Got her killed, as you'd know. Your other Reis, I know as much as there is to know about them. They like giggling a lot to each other and also crude, toilet humor... You have no idea.  
"But you: I've never had the chance to meet to you. But... here I am, now; saying a big 'hello' to our currently active Rei. Tell me, what is it that should I know about you?"  
"For one, I don't go to parties."  
"Oh?" Kaworu thought at this. "Well, we're going to have to change all that, won't we? Don't you want to go, though? Ever thought about going wild for at least _one_ day in your life?"  
"No."  
"Oh," he grimaced. "Not even just out of curiosity, though? Not even just to check the place out?"  
What Kaworu was pushing towards was something that Rei felt desperate to want to get out of. Even so, Rei also wanted to know more.

_Of course_, she thought. _Of course I'm curious now that you keep going on about it._  
"Aha, so I thought!"  
Rei was surprised. She had already figured that Kaworu can read her mind, but was in no mood to discuss it, now.

Rei got up, intending to leave Kaworu and his intense pressure put on her. But then, she remembered that there was nowhere she could go where Kaworu would not be. She was, almost literally, stuck with Kaworu, indefinitely. To her horror, she knew she couldn't escape, and so did Kaworu.

Kaworu seemed to be smiling; leaning on his hand, on a table (even though Kaworu wasn't anywhere in particular). "Well? What's it going to be? It's a Saturday. I can show you the way to party-dom..."

Rei was trapped.  
"What have you got to lose?"  
Rei could just see that broadening smile on his pseudo-face.

Rei paused. Not because she had to think about it, but just because she felt she had to.  
This voice, this Kaworu, knew very well she couldn't get out of it.

"Well, baby," Kaworu asked, not receiving a decking, "wanna come with me?"

Rei looked, pseudo-ly, at Kaworu.  
Her answer was inevitable.  
"Alright."  
She may have been defeated, this time, but she didn't show it. She remained the same, cool Rei, showing nothing of what she really felt to anyone. Not Kaworu, not herself. At least for the time, being.

Kaworu's smile didn't move. "Great," he said. "Let's go shopping."

* * *

**Next time**:  
Rei goes shopping! Just as Rei gets the necessary money from her back account, it all get's stolen! Following the chase, spurred on by Kaworu's desperate urges, Rei finally apprehends the culprit. But what sort of clothing can Kaworu possibly suggest Rei to buy? And why did the shop assistant close up shop with Rei still in the dressing rooms?  
All, and more, will be revealed in the next chapter: First Stop  
And boy, are we gonna get more service in the dressing rooms! 

(As of the time of writing this, approximately 1.0 percent of all readers have given a review. If you find it in your heart that you feel something about this fic, please leave by a review. Otherwise, you must be one of the heartless 99.0 percent of readers... The world is a cruel place. Cue thunder and pattering rain sound effects.)


	3. First Stop

I regret to announce, this early on in the game, that there will unlikely be any place for the character of Asuka in this fic, and, in fact, every other character is more of a side-character. Although the fate of the other characters are already predetermined, if public demand becomes significant, the character of Asuka may be somehow worked into the plot before it is too late. Thank you for your attention.

**BDSM** _abbr._ bondage; discipline; domination and submission; sadism and masochism. 

Comedy: 56 pt  
Drama: 10 pt  
Descriptive: 34 pt

Now's your chance to watch The Phantom of the Opera. Go ask your relatives the DVD for Christmas.

* * *

**First Stop**

The day was at its prime. The sun shone down blaringingly onto the world, below, casting awful shadows where it can. The cicada-buzz saturated the air with a heat, unbearable; and an energy electrified it, tingling the senses like soda fizz.  
And in all this, Rei made her way to the local shopping mall in her school uniform.

Rei was not a frequent customer to the KABUKI Center. She only ever visited for a few bits of odds and ends like toothbrushes or red shampoo. The rest, she often ordered in bulk to be delivered to her door, like instant ramen.  
Therefore, this sort of visit to the shopping center would have been regarded as "unnecessary" by Rei since she was here not for any of the above. However, through the persuasion of a voice in her head, she was led to come to KABUKI for a round of shopping to prepare for her first drop-by to a rich girl's party with the entire school invited. Rei's inclination to follow this voice's suggestions could not be explained by the fact that she first experienced it during her first dream, and next whilst she was showering; or that the hot chocolate the voice offered Rei was made by Rei, anyway. It would be disappointing to report, then, that the shopping mall had no psychiatric ward nor mental asylum in its complex.

Fortunately, for Kaworu - the owner of the voice, this meant that he could hang around for just a bit longer, at least as long as he needed to. For now, Kaworu's first mission was to get Rei some good clothes.

"Alright, Rei," Kaworu said as they entered the mall, "firstly, I don't mean to be stingy, but we need some money. Did you bring much? Or have much?"  
"We can withdraw money from my account at that ATM," Rei replied.  
"Right, right, let's get to it..."  
Rei inserted her card and punched in some number, to which Kaworu was asked not to look at. When Kaworu was allowed to look, again, he near lost his pseudo-balance. "_Whoah,_" Kaworu was taken aback. "7,788,656 _Yen_?"  
"How much will we need?"  
"Forget 'need', let's take it all! I think we can seriously give you a make-over to remember for a thousand years...!"

Rei felt somewhat reluctant to just take out her life-savings and to spend it on a cause that she rather wished she did not have to take part in, so felt she had to verify the validity of its justification. In her most brilliantly neutral tone, she asked, "Must we really withdraw all this money?"

Kaworu attempted to stay under control from the sight of all that money. "Well, er, that is - if it's okay with you... I mean, what, are you saving for something?"  
"No. My weekly living expenses leaves a substantial excess of money, which I leave in this deposit. I haven't consider what to do with the money, yet."  
"Well, I think I've found the perfect thing to do with it. Come on, let's take it and go shopping!"  
Rei couldn't hold her ground. "Alright."

As quickly as the cash spewed out of the ATM - all ¥7,788,656 - the man standing behind Rei snatched it out of her hands, bagged it and ran. "Yoink."  
Kaworu sweatdropped. Rei looked as the man ran.  
"Rei! Aren't you going to do something? Go catch him!" Kaworu urged. "He's getting away with my money!"  
"My money."  
"Whatever! Just go!"  
Rei sighed. "Alright."

Rei dashed after the robber.  
"There he is!" Kaworu called, pointing. "The one wearing the pink tutu, carrying the black bag!"  
"I can tell," Rei replied, homed in and gaining on him.

The background of the mall flashed by the pursuer and the pursued into a blur like streaks of water-color. It was as if the two were perfectly stationary, and the surroundings moved. It was like a cost-effective method of animation.  
But Rei was catching up fast. She had the leg-power. The man in the pink tutu didn't have it in those thin, little hairy legs of his. Rei was almost there.

Now was the time to strike...

"_Hyaaa...!_"  
Rei screamed as she did a flying kick aimed right at the culrpit's face. The man could only see Rei's shoe, and a miniscule peek up her skirt when he turned around for the last time...  
The two collided and flew right into the adjacent porn shop with a crash.

The robber's eyes swirled as he lay on a pile of magazines in the gay section. Rei was found dusting herself off under the more popular section, 'shaved'.  
"Very appropriate," Kaworu commented, nodding.  
Rei picked up the black bag next to the man in the pink tutu, and walked off...

"So, this is the first place I want you see take a look through," Kaworu said. "It's great. It's got everything you need to make you look like the badass girl you are."  
"I am badass?"  
"You damn straight will be when I'm through with you. But then again, I guess we could try for 'sweet'... No, we'll take you here, first, and we'll decide whether it's for you..."

Rei was standing in front of a neat little store named "Graffiti". The only people who walked through those doors, however, were goths, punks and general BDSM enthusiasts. That all changed when Rei stepped through.

"_Hi_," the shop assistant greeted in plain English.  
He, himself, had the whole eye-brow ring, Mohawk, blackness and chewing-gum thing going on.  
"You need some help, girl, or are you fine?" The shop assistant was looking Rei and her figure up and down. He wondered what a cute chick in a schoolgirl uniform was doing in a store which featured badass clothing and bondage equipment on a hot Saturday afternoon. In those very words.  
Kaworu saw that Rei needed to quickly get through the pleasantries. "Yeah. Rei, just say you don't need any help, okay?"

Rei looked at the shop assistant for a silent moment. "I won't need any help."  
"Good," Kaworu continued. "Now smile and walk away."

_Smile?_ Rei rethought this direction Kaworu was giving her. _You want me to smile?_  
"Yes! Now do it!"

Rei looked at the shop assistant for another silent moment before she smiled. Unfortunately, for her, this hit him like a ton of bricks. Rei walked away, immediately.  
_That was unusual, for me to..._  
"Yeah," Kaworu said, taking a good look at the shop assistant again as they walked into the store. "Maybe that was a bad idea, to smile..."

The shop was interesting, to say the least. Although the whips, the black leather straps, the fluffy, pink handcuffs and other things, unspeakable, were found waiting to be picked up as they went around, Kaworu managed to direct Rei's attention to the badass clothing he was talking about.  
What Kaworu managed to carefully select as they made a trip around the store were black, leather pants with a nice pattern of horizontal black cord down the side; a short, tight, white top; a tiny, shiney, black, latex form of a waistcoat and a soft, black, flat cap.  
"This is great. Let's try it on!" Kaworu enthused. "Change rooms over there..."

Apparently, the shop assistant got some ideas. He cleared the shop and locked the shutters, putting a sign up that said, "Back in 5 minutes."  
It was now just Rei and the shop assistant...  
And Kaworu, who wasn't really anywhere in particular.

Inside the dressing room, Rei slid off her school uniform, somehow not uncomfortable under the general presense of Kaworu. As he explained, "I've already seen too much at the tanks," by which he meant he spent a sufferable amount of time in the giddy world of NERV's holding tanks for the spare Reis.  
First to come off, for Rei, was the red bow. The ribbon hung droopily on the hook. A few silent pops of some buttons, the loosening of the middle, then the aqua-blue dress was allowed to fall off her shoulders, softly onto her delicate hands - placed to the side. Through the mirror, Rei's large, white shirt - the only garnment left - had much length, coming down to safely cover up below the hips, though it was already teadiously, slowly being unbottoned.

Then, the shirt was placed on the hook, also.  
Even under the insufficient lighting of the store, Graffiti, Rei's smooth, pale skin - of her slender arms, the symmetrical hills of her back, her bare legs - was just as white as her cotton undergarnments. Now, this very skin would have the exciting oppurtunity to shine from under the blackness of her new clothing. Or at least, it might have been exciting for others.

First, the black leather pants. Rei did not often wear pants. These ones form-fitted her thighs tightly. Then the white top. In the mirror, Rei could see it only managed to cover her breasts, leaving a good deal of her lower torso exposed. And now, the black, shiney, latex version of a waistcoat. People used to only dream of owning one of these. Now, Rei wore it, left unbottoned. Finally, the black, flat cap. So simple, yet so outspoken.  
What Rei saw in the mirror was The Badass Rei.

"Absolutely beautiful, isn't it?" Kaworu commented, lightly holding his chin with two fingers and with a pleased smile. "I have created a monster; elegantly organic, synthetically formed."  
"I don't think this suits me."  
"Come on, now! Haven't you been looking at the mirror? Look at you!"  
"Kaworu, look at this waistcoat - it's even too small to be buttoned without difficulty." Rei demonstrated by pulling the two sides together, ending up four inches apart. Rei's chest was being squeezed much by the top, already, but to button up the waistcoat would be the equivalent of wearing a corset upside-down.  
"Ah, but it's not meant to be buttoned up..."

Before the conversation went on to the I'm-telling-you-No-Let-me-tell-you path, the curtains slid violently with a screech and the head of the shop assistant popped itself in. "Hey, baby, wanna- _Ugh!_"

This was a reflex, and so Rei did not have time to develop a shocked disgust for the shop assistant to knock him out with hatred.

His head snapped just as quickly back to position, now with such an evil smile that even the local travelling circus would have been ashamed. "Feisty," he said, rubbing the back of his hand along his lip. "We're playing rough, now, aren't we?" Suddenly, raising his hand, there Rei beheld the thick, black whip in its grasps - yes, a whip. The shop assistant's eyes were suddenly of terrifying evil.  
"Oh... shit," Kaworu said.

With a wild whip of his arm, the instrument crashed into and through the cubicle. Rei dodged, the rest that didn't were annihilated. The mirror shattered, Rei's school uniform shredded.  
Rei slipped out and ran.  
The shutters were locked. "Not good!" Kaworu stated. Rei turned back to see where she could go: nowhere.  
The shop assistant came after her.  
This was another chase.

And so, as dramatically as it could possibly be, Rei dashed around the store with the shop assistant after her, cracking his whip. The blur around them were of badass clothing, whips, black leather straps, fluffy, pink handcuffs and other things, unspeakable, waiting to be picked up. And this gave Kaworu an idea.

"Rei!" Kaworu yelled, as if the roar of the wind was loud. "Pick up that fluffy, pink handcuff!"  
A sharp tilting maneuver, as Rei dashed past, and Rei had a fluffy, pink hadcuff in her hand.  
"Alright! Now that green gag!"  
Done.  
"Ah! And that spikey, black club!"  
Taken.  
"Ooh! And that large, cute bunny costume!"  
"Kaworu! Now's not the time to go cosplaying!"  
"Oh, right! Now, Rei... Now's the time to defend your honor! Now's the time to utilize your self-defense skills! Use the force, Rei! Use the force!"  
"The what?"  
"Oh, I guess I better teach you, one day," Kaworu smiled smugly. "Because only _I_ have the power to use my AT-Field! Now, Rei, trust me and turn around!"

Rei felt like she was being toyed with, but twisted around to a stop, anyway. There, she saw the small figure of the shop assistant in the distance growing exponentially. She held her spikey, black club up, ready for a batting. Realistically, it was more problable that the whip would get her first before she could get him. However, Rei could only do as Kaworu said. The shop assistant continued to charge right at her.  
Just as his arms were raised for another whip-crack, he smashed right into an orange hexagon... Kaworu's AT-Field.  
The shop assistant fell onto his back. "Ow..."  
For a moment, dazed, he saw Rei walk up and smash his head in with the spikey, black club. That was it.

The man lapsed to the floor, indefinitely; the spikey, black club still attatched to his head.

For added measure, and for the hell of it, Rei and Kaworu fluffly, pink handcuffed the shop assistant, gagged and tied the man into a ball. He was let to roll off somewhere down the store.

"Good, Rei," Kaworu said, in a heroic voice, perhaps mocking her again. "You have learnt much about the way of BDSM..."  
"Actually, Gendou and I used to use with these things a lot..."  
"A _wha_-?" Kaworu instantaneously fell over backwards in a sudden shock.

"Just kidding," Rei said, with a small, sly smile. "I just wanted to see you fall over."  
"Yeah, real funny; don't give me attitude," Kaworu said, pseudo-getting back up. "That was more shocking than having to spend my time with a tank full of toilet-humor-happy Reis... Ugh..." Kaworu shivered.  
"That was for putting me in a dangerous situation and letting my school clothes be destroyed!"

In reality, Rei said the above in a practically neutral tone, like she normally would. However, Kaworu couldn't help but get a hint that Rei was placing an exclamation point at the end of that statement. It was almost uncanny.

"Let's get out of here..." Kaworu said, "with the bunny suit."  
"Should we pay?"  
"No," Kaworu said, psuedo-walking towards the door. Rei followed (with) suit. "He tried to kill us. It's only fair we walk off with a bunny suit..."

And so, they went. Kaworu, though nowhere in particular, seemed to walk in front of Rei, leading her; Rei followed with a large shopping bag, containing the bunny suit, in black, leather pants; a short, tight, white top; a shiney, black, latex form of a waistcoat and a soft, black, flat cap; without the price tag.

Rei attempted to walk as normally as she could.  
Eventually, she whispered to Kaworu, "These clothes are chaffing me..."  
"Don't say that out loud!"  
"Maybe if we'd stay a bit longer to _find the right size_..."  
"But tight clothes _do_ look good on you."  
"I say we now try for 'sweet', next."  
"How about a mix of 'sweet' _and_ 'badass'?"

As Rei followed Kaworu, somebody came round the corner and Rei promptly smacked herself into it.

She looked up from the familiar chest to see those same manly eyes that were, at the same time, a glistening dark shade of brown, now in a leather jacket. Rei immediately saw that this senior student from her school was dressed in exactly the same taste as what she wore.  
Kaworu's reaction, when he noticed the student, too, was in an ogling state of frozen schock. His eyes were large as he looked upon this guy of a "hunk".  
"Holy..."

"Hey," those shades of brown said.  
Rei didn't speak.  
Kaworu jumped in, "Are you going to say something?"  
Rei replied, "Yes?"  
"Yeah, are you shopping alone?"  
"Say 'yes'! Say 'yes'!"  
"Yes."  
"Yeah, cool. You're looking hot."  
"Say 'you too'! Say 'you too'!"  
"Yes."  
"Huh..."

This senior student of Rei's school was often used to girls jumping all over him, but sadly, in all his years of existance, they werenever the ones he sought. They either weren't interested (school-work obsessed), were interested in another guy (Shinji - although he still remains absolutely clueless), were dead (those unfortunate enough to come between an Eva and its prey), were lesbian (Michiko) or were the likes ofRei.

"Playing hard to get, are we?" He looked at Rei amusedly with a tilted head as if he was looking through a peephole. "Keep it up... See you later... tonight."  
And he walked off.

After a long pause:  
"That's it?" Kaworu asked simply. "The same three-lettered words three times (at least in English - 'hai')?"  
"I don't know..." Rei began. "I don't know why..."

There was something about that senior student that made him almost unusually creepy to be around for Rei. She couldn't place her finger on it. The mere presence of him did something to Rei: It made her stand still and become helplessly unable to do anything. It made her unable to even move her eyes. It made her uncontrollably say "yes" three times. Rei didn't like it one bit.

Rei and Kaworu stood there, looking at him walking away into the distance, through the sparse crowd.

"Hey, did you check out that guy's ass? Whoa!"

"No..." Rei's head finally began to clear.

"Really? Whoa..."

* * *

**Next time**:  
Rei finds a 'sweet' clothing shop! Dresses, skirts, marshmallow-sweetness - this store has it all! After only several minutes of trying on different clothing, Rei finally finds the perfect set. But what is the catch with this store? And what other setbacks will Rei find in trying to purchase her dream outfit?  
Find out in the next, mindless chapter: Happy Smile 

(Leave by a review and that small contribution may go a long way. It may not feed the hungry, but it may well change the fate of the fic for the better. All comments welcome - mostly.)


	4. Happy Smile

I was hoping to have the seventh chapter up by Christmas, but that seems, now, to be out of the question. Well, I'll just continue posting these chapters up as soon as possible. I hope you'll coninue to enjoy...

Comedy: 70 pt  
Drama: 10 pt  
Descriptive: 20 pt

Also, I'm urging you to go watch The Phantom of the Opera. Even attend the original musical, just go watch it!

* * *

**Happy Smile**

Always, man seeks for what he has not. In Rei's case, these were non-chaffing clothes.

The leather of her pants creaked as she walked, a sound that makes anyone uncomfortable just hearing it. And despite being indoors, the black also made her uncomfortably hot underneath. Her top was so tight, she had a more difficult time breathing her little breaths. The only piece of her new set of clothes that didn't bother her was that black flat cap.  
And so, Rei made her way to a shop that offered more relaxed, comfortable clothing. At least something that didn't chaff her so much.

What Kaworu had suggested and Rei had insisted was the type of clothing known as 'sweet'. And the shop they consequently had to land on was the shop known as "Happy Smile". The furigana helped in their pronunciation as they stood outside, facing the shop, reading the name and looking at the marshmallow-sweetness displayed behind the big panes of glass.

"And so," Kaworu commentated, "we find ourselves standing outside, facing this shop, reading the name and looking at the marshmallow-sweetness displayed behind those big panes of glass. Let's hope you find what you're here for."  
"The shop seems to project a type of child-like amusement park atmosphere around itself," Rei remarked.  
"Sure. And I can just hear the happy, piping music, too."  
"You're exaggerating."  
"No seriously, listen..."

Rei let this go, and walked to the entrace where a shop assistant blocked the way. The woman - chubby, friendly, mid-30s - smiled an extremely large, happy smile and greeted, "_Irasshaimase...!_"  
Rei, with her typical emotionless face, said nothing, waiting to be let in.  
"Well," the shop assistant went, "what's with the glumy-ness? Now, you know, I can't let you in till I see your happy smile. Let's see your happy smile..." The woman's face was at tearing-point with a major smile stretching across it. She seemed to be doing so as a demonstration for Rei. "Where's that happy smile...?"

Kaworu was taking aback. His own award-winning smile was no match for this. "Alright, I'm not so sure if you should smile, Rei. Last time you did that, _this_ happened." He gestured towards Rei's problematic outfit.  
_This is the only 'sweet' store in the city; if I don't enter, I will not be able to find any 'sweet' clothing easily elsewhere._  
"Yeah, but who said 'sweet' was for you?"  
_I must enter,_ Rei replied.

Taking a deep breath, Rei smiled just enough to be admitted into the store.  
"Welcome to Happy Smile," the shop assistant congratulated, her smile tightening beyond general imagination.

Nimbly, Rei dashed in and grabbed as many dresses and skirts as possible, and right into the dressing rooms.  
There, she tried them all on, and all of which looked fine. It was that last one that she became particularly fond of, and all else slipped away from her mind.

It was a neat, bleached pink cotton t-shirt, with a light imprint of a large frangipani flower. The turtleneck of it draped snugly, but loosely, around her neck. And also, there was the skirt. It reached down low, almost to the floor. It was a dark, purple-blue; not too saturated to outbalance her upper-half, though. All in all, it was absolutely pretty, and absolutely 'sweet'.  
There was a true smile on Rei's face, now, spinning around, looking at herself through the mirror.

She went out to show Kaworu, who - although was nowhere in particular - was outside, watching out for anyone suspiscous enough to sneak on Rei whilst she was trying out her clothing.

The curtains parted, and Rei spun out with the 'sweet' outfit. The style, there, was somehow reminiscent of the Old-Vietnamese era. Kaworu was in awe. "Oh, my! This is truly marvelous! If we fix your hair up for this, you will be one hell of a Sweet Rei!"

The others of the store's occupants thought so, too. All the women who were around crowded around Rei, squealing delights of awe and affection. "Kyaaa! Kawaii!" ("Ahhh! So cute!") Rei responded by soaking up all this with a Happy Smile.  
She enjoyed this attention, all of a sudden.

At this moment, another moment was probably needed for Kaworu to fully contemplate the implications of Rei's behavior. Rei was dancing around amongst a crowd of friendly shoppers in a "sweet" outfit. It wasn't that he hadn't spent that long with Rei, he probably already had more contact with her than any of her other peers in their lifetimes; Kaworu probably was wholly ignorant.  
The fact was, this was inexplicably not the Rei everybody knew.

The excitement, finally calming, allowed Rei to approach the shop assistant. "I'll take these!"  
"Oh! Yes, of course! That will be ¥180,000!" The shop assistant said, showing her to the counter.  
"Great. Oh, can I walk out with these on?"  
The shop assistant's mood then changed. "No! You must change to these elsewhere."  
"What?" Rei's mood also change. "But, but- I'm only just starting to enjoy these non-chaffing clothes! Why?"  
"I'm sorry, store policy."  
"How-?"  
Rei was allowed no further questioning. She grumbled and went back into her changeroom.

She next walked out with those chaffing, black clothes, again.

When Kaworu turned around, he suddenly had a feeling that something was not right. Rei's red eyes seemed dulled by her absolutely placid and, yet, evidently tense face. It seemed to read, "I'm not in the mood," as Rei walked out wordlessly with the clothing in one arm and the black bag in the other. Simply, Rei seemed to be as she always were.  
Kaworu was about to remark on this, but couldn't find the words nor logic to what he felt. He was able to detect Rei's current cold attitude, yet he totally did not notice Rei acting all - in a word - normal just before. But the sudden switch back triggered alarm bells at the back of his mind.  
Kaworu continued to think as he went down with Rei.  
"Well, we'll find a restroom, somewhere, then?" Kaworu suggested as Rei reached the checkout counter.  
"Yes, that will be ¥180,000." The checkout lady said, also having a Happy Smile.  
All Rei had to do was take out ¥180,000 in cash and hand it over, and she could go off and enjoy her new 'sweet' clothes. Rei pulled up her black bag and opened it up. Her head peered down into it...

It shot right back up again with shock, disguised as a happy smile. Her eyes told otherwise, and Kaworu pseudo-bent over to take a look.

Kaworu was able to say, "Holy...!"

The checkout lady held still with the Happy Smile still on, waiting. "Yes?"

Rei won't be pulling any 180,000 yen out soon, as the black bag was full of porn magazines.

"Hm..." Kaworu pondered whilst his nose was under high blood pressure, "I wonder if there're any ones featuring guys cosplaying, too..."

Situations like these were always awkward, and always happening at the worst of times.  
_What are we going to do?_ Rei pseudo-whispered sideways.  
Rei was trapped, once again. The outfit of her dreams were held for ¥180,000, and all she had were porn magazines in the bag. As Rei was well aware, she had taken the wrong black bag from the porn shop.  
"Rei," Kaworu said, "desperate times call for deserate measures..." There was a pause. "Let's run."

They ran.

"Stop!" The checkout assistant panicked, and tapped the button under the counter repeatedly. "Theif!"

Sirens screamed. Lights spun.  
The entire security team rushed out and the mall that Rei ran through suddenly became a blizzard storm of people and panic.

Rei had to lose them.  
"Rei, we gotta lose 'em!" Kaworu cried.  
She hoped it wouldn't be too hard.  
"It can't be too hard!" Kaworu continued. "There's already enough confusion, everywhere, as it is. Let's just get out, and we'd be safe!"

Rei dashed through the mall. Security guards were among the crowd, though, and it was only a matter of chance for Rei to bump into one. Chance was that unforgiving when Rei bumped into one as she was just about to go through the emergency exit.  
All the guards knew who to look out for. The quick description they got over the radio was simple. "Badass albino girl with blue hair!"

"Ah! You!" The guard caught her right away.  
With lightening speed, Rei threw a magazine right into the guard's face. Stunned for a second, Rei used the time to smack the guard unconscious with the whole bag, itself, leaving it, and run out.

The air, outside, had never been so refreshing. The two o'clock sun shone down on Rei like she was a goddess brought to life. Rei leaned against the barrier of the roof she was on, trying to regain some breath.

"An emergency exit to the roof?" Kaworu muttered to himself.

The black of her pants heated her under the sun, and her tight top disallowed her to take very deep breaths. Very soon, Rei became very discontented with her situation, and especially with her chaffing clothes.

"Say, Rei," Kaworu said as he psuedo-regained his breath, "I had a thought whilst we were down there at Happy Smile. When you were coming out of the change rooms... Um, something made me think you had changed when you came out... Er, I don't know what it was, though... Did you, Rei?"  
Rei didn't move, but said in her neutral tone, "Of course. That's what you do in change rooms: change."  
Kaworu almost smacked himself for being so ambiguous, whilst wondering for a fleeting moment how that pun could work in both English and Japanese. "No, that's not what I meant. I mean, when you came out, you were all... like you are now...? Quiet? Cool? Can do some serious kung-fu butt-kicking?"  
Rei still did not move. "I don't think I was ever not so."  
Kaworu had regained his breath by now, and was certain there was something going on. "No, Rei, there was something about you just before that..." With each word, Kaworu grew in certainty as the near-past seemed to make itself clearer. "You were acting... different before then. When you were in those 'sweet' clothes... You were... dancing around!"  
Now Rei did move. She turned her head to look Kaworu in the pseudo-eyes. Her face was blank with a question mark on it. "I don't remember that..."  
Kaworu got up, pointing and shaking his pseudo-finger at Rei, all the while looking transfixed at her. "But I do..."

After that, Kaworu couldn't say any more. There was nothing more to say, and the matter was mutually abandoned.  
Butfact was, Kaworu hadn't forgotten the idea that popped into his head, then, which was this: Rei had just jumped from one personality to another when she saw herself dressed in 'sweet' clothes. The idea didn't entirely gel, but Kaworu knew he was thinkingin the right direction.

After a moment of silence, Rei announced. "We will go home. I'll have to change to my 'sweet' clothes there, and that will be that."  
Kaworu still had other ambitions, however. "No we won't. We'll still be left with some problems, anyway. For one, we can only get off this roof through where we came - back down through the mall. And another, you haven't gotten yourself a wardrobe, yet! And most importantly, we _have_ to get back my money."  
"My money."  
"All the more reason to! We need it back. We can't let it fall into the hands of whichever bastard was lucky enough to get it." Kaworu clenched his pseudo-fists. "We must regain our honour!"  
"Then..." Perhaps it was Kaworu's way of speech that made Rei submit and realize she had to do it. "Then, where will we look?"  
"I think we have no choice," Kaworu faced Rei with shining eyes, "but to start from where we last saw it."  
"No," Rei shooked her head weakly, pleadingly. "Not the porn shop..."

"We must. It isn't that bad. At least we didn't lose it at Manga 'R' Us. The creepiest of all who we can ever encounter are the otaku. Hell, if we were an anime, I bet they'd written over 4,000 fics in _English_ about us right now! Half of which would be about me, of course..."  
Kaworu was quite wrong, luckily.  
"We will need a disguise to get through the main hall, again," Rei interjected.  
Kaworu thought for a moment, then got it. "Right, you see that brown paper bag, there? Put it on. And a draw a face on it. A man with glasses and a moustache."  
"This is ridiculous..."

"Well, then," Kaworu huffed, looking at Rei, "what have you got?"  
Rei looked at what she had. "I have this... no."  
This can't be.

"Of course!" Kaworu jumped. "The bunny suit!"

* * *

**Next time**:  
Rei wears a bunny suit! Looking for the lost bag money, Rei and Kaworu enter the mysterious realm of The Porn Shop! But just as frighteningly, Rei gets taken into a dark room, now alone with a stranger. Will she be able to find her money, even if she escapes from the man? And what are the outcomes when Rei bumps into a certain someone after the ordeal?  
Prepare for another thrill ride in the next, moving chapter: Star-crossed  
Fan service? Yes, sir; three bags full, sir! 

(Can you work out how the "change room" pun can work for both Japanese and English?)


	5. Star crossed

Apologies for not being able to update, recently, and apologies, in advance, for not being able to update in the near future. Rest assure, this fic will go on till the very end, I just have some business to attend to. You can expect more chapters after the beginning of February.  
Enjoy this one, meanwhile.

Comedy: 50 pt  
Drama: 40 pt  
Descriptive: 10 pt

Well, let's on with it!

* * *

**Star-crossed**

Echoes of murmurs wafted through the air, going about their own business in their own cold, indifferent ways. Hazy, diffused, suspended and sustained; the mumbling nothings parted and regrouped, sifting passively around those others, who were passing through their world. The hums were diluted in this world. The ones who pass through would feel but a small, continuous buzz of vibrations, occasionally catching only those small, undissolved utterances that drifted here and there in this soup of the irrelevant.  
One, insoluble phrase that managed to work its way through was this, "Hey, baby, wanna- _ugh!_"  
The last syllable froze the concoction for a brief moment before letting it resume, as the echo dissipated to the next realm of nothingness.

Down the mall, a fluffy tail and the back-side of a large bunny costume swayed minimally as it walked to the porn shop. The people who passed Rei by and noticed her were, consequently, looking in the other direction - assumably out of embarrassment, disgust, respect or those that range between the given three, and even in combination. Those that were not - and there was only one instance of that as Rei walked down - were quickly decked and placed in a dark, convenient corner.  
Such was life.

Kaworu wasn't in the best of moods as he tagged along. He hung his head sulkily as they walked to the porn shop. "Oh, this is cruddy. _I_ should be the one walking in that costume..."  
Rei wasn't in the best of moods as she led the way. She rigidly walked, with an agitated look, pressing her lips together. "It was not _I_ who asked to dress up in this costume, either..."  
"Oh, but think of the money."  
"Then shut up."

Kaworu winced, hearing this from Rei. He recalled how, once, Rei's attitude was like this when he first came to meet her in that dream. There was only just a small flicker of it revealed as Rei had that dream - _What'ya gotta know is when to keep your mouth shut. The First only lasted a few years, stupid kid. Hah!_ He recalled how he explained it as Rei loosing self-control. Then, was this what Rei is like, underneath? he wondered. And what, then, was that other Rei in Happy Smile? Nonetheless, something told him that, to a certain degree, that dream may be beginning to come true...

The next thing that came to his mind was that he was pseudo-standing in front of the porn shop. And it was also, infamously, entitled "The Porn Shop".  
"Let's go," Rei said, suddenly, and bravely walked right in, bunny-tail slightly wagging.

She was immediately attended to by the shop assistant. "Ah! There we are!" He said, as if expecting Rei. "We've been waiting for you, baby!" Rei was ushered hurriedly to the back of the store. "The photo-shoot started ten minutes ago! Let's go, let's go!"  
Rei was entirely unprepared for this, and her automatic decking-reflex did not register this sort of thing as a threat. (There must be a "come" in the sentence.)In a blur, she was shoved into small room with lights and a black backdrop, and a photographer waiting impatiently. The door closed as she staggered to balance herself into the middle of the shooting-grounds.

"So, we're here, are we?" he said in his professional photographer's voice. "Okay, Micchan, let's start with the full suit on, first, then..." _Flash._  
Rei blinked.

"Okay, good. We gotta loosen up, a bit; pull back the hood by the ears, shall we?"

_Flash._  
Rei, at that point, became super-uncomfortable.

Meanwhile, Kaworu pseudo-stood there, with an appalled face, looking at this photo-shoot.  
He though to himself, _That should be_ me _posing, there._  
_Kaworu,_ Rei's thought intruded, _what should I do?_  
"Well, should we play along...?"  
_No!_  
"Well, what can we do?" Kaworu struggled to think, then looked about for something. "How much are we making?"  
He glanced around for a cheque-book and spotted one with some figures already scrawled across it - ¥8,000.  
"Well," Kaworu told Rei, "they sure do rip you off. Let's get out of here."

Satisfied with this course of action, Rei walked off the job.  
"Hey, hey, hey, where're you going?" The photographer lowered his camera. "Come back, here- _Ugh!_"  
Rei's decking-reflex was back.

"Perfect," Kaworu nodded as they came back out the door. "Let's get to work..."

The porn shop did not have many customers. Chances were, they were unlikely to meet any person in the next isle. This was, of course and contradictorily, one of the reasons why the store was popular among customers. This also allowed Rei and Kaworu plenty of room to conduct their search for the missing 7,788,656 yen.  
"Let's walk about and look," Kaworu had said. In fact, "browse..."  
Rei gave a weird pseudo-look at Kaworu.  
"We must not look conspicuous," he replied.  
Putting aside that there were not many people around, Rei shot back, "The bunny suit is conspicuous enough."  
A smile came from Kaworu. "Well, I did tell you to put that brown paper bag on, didn't I?"  
Rei grumbled.  
True. A brown paper bag was not considered conspicuous in The Porn Shop.

Amongst other sections, Rei and Kaworu explored the Vintage Porn section - no-one around. The Pokémon section - no-one either. The Top 100 section - well, no-one suspicious. After this much, Kaworu needed to slightly alter the course of action. "You know, I think we need to start off from where we last saw the guy. That is, uh, the gay section."  
Rei felt like squeezing her temples in frustration. "I suppose so."

And thus, they entered the unholy domain of what is really a small corner of the store. As they silently slid into the isle, Kaworu was instantly zapped, inexplicably, into a weird state of silence. He was frozen on the spot.  
Rei looked back to him, "Kaworu, are you coming?  
"This..." Kaworu begun. "This place is sort of... affecting me..."  
_Of all places, not this,_ Rei sort of prayed. "Please, Kaworu, focus."  
"What, with these guys around?" Kaworu gestured to all the masculine skin that managed to make their way to the front cover of each magazine. "What do you take me for? Even an angel has- _whoah!_ would you look at that one!"  
Despite being essentially angel - for that is what he is - Kaworu, in his mind, was, first and foremost, still a man. Or, at least, a boy. At the same time, Kaworu appeared shamelessly homosexual - not that there was anything wrong with that for Rei. However, this combination was one of the reasons why Rei found it hard to work with him in her (newly reformed) daily life. Rei shook her head. "Kaworu..."

There was a rustle, and then sharp silence behind Rei.  
Rei turned around to see what it was.

He was a regular at the store. Simple, but weird. Obsessed? Partly. Otaku? No, since the term would imply he would have spent the most of his life at home, and that wasn't the case. Unusual? Definitely.  
He was a fat man, wore crappy glasses, and was an intense browser. He was socially incompetent since childhood, and had developed a strong paranoia to all people on Earth. Only those that he had the good fortune to meet on flat, printed paper and TV screens was he ever marginally comfortable with. And so, it is now that he had the misfortune to have a close encounter of the third kind with Rei, talking to her invisible friend.  
This stole ever single nerve he ever had in him.

Rei turned to see a fat man wearing crappy glasses standing at the end of the isle, stiff and unmoving like a rabbit staring at two speeding headlights coming right at him, not that rabbits still existed during that day and age. But that wasn't what Rei was concerned with. What she was concerned with was a black bag hanging, strapped around the man, held by him like a five-year-old would a blankie. This was exactly what she was looking for, or at least, what originally Kaworu was looking for.  
Rei approached him.

"Excuse me..."

The fat man was startled to almost certain death. He had an untrusting fear in his eyes, which here wide open. He was frozen.

"That is my bag."

Now it was worse. He jumped into further tension. He held the bag closer to himself, showing nervous jerks of terrified shaking. His mouth were pressed, flattened together with pure terror. Beads of sweat rolled down his ugly face.

Rei lifted one arm towards him.

This was the stuff of nightmares. The fat man jerkingly backed up, still stiff as a board. He was uncontrollably shaky. His look of terror went beyond all boundaries of description.

"When all else fails," Kaworu said, "use brute force." Rei walked up to the fat man in an attempt to take it off him.

The terror was so great that short utterances of horror was expressed. "No. No. No. No, no; no..." His shaky way in backing up caused him to collide with the selves behind him. He shook there, unable to get away, about to be approached by this crazy woman in a bunny suit to take away his bag of treasures.

Rei tugged at the bag, as Kaworu had suggested. However, it seemed that the fat man's grip on it did not let it loose.

"No, no. No."

The fat man didn't seem to be putting too much effort into keeping hold of his bag - it was more of an iron-grip reflex. It seemed the most of his energy was put into shaking and holding that expression of horror on his face. The shaking was worse than a space shuttle lift-off, causing the surrounding magazines on the shelf to jitter and fall off.

"No. No, no, no."

"Damn, this guy is relentless," Kaworu remarked, looking at this fruitless situation.  
_What do I do?_  
"Well, I'd say the best thing to do would be to reveal to him that this is not _his_ bag." The rest would take care of itself, was what Kaworu rightly figured.  
_As you say._

Rei pulled open the zipper. "This bag is not yours."

The fat man went crazy at this. As crazy as a man like him could have gone.  
His eyes gaped wide open. As bank notes fluttered out, the fat man dropped to the floor in disbelief.

"No! No! No, no! No!" he cried as if the world was ending.

Rei looked on this with a sweatdrop.  
"Hey, not bad at all."  
"Sorry?" Rei turned around to see what Kaworu was on about.  
"Your sweatdrop," Kaworu pointed. "It's just that, I've never saw you sweatdrop before. Nice one you got, there."  
As Rei's sweatdrop fell, she caught it on her hand, and looked at it. "Sweatdrops? Is this me sweatdropping?"  
That, which she had in her hand, was a first. Ground-breaking, in terms of Rei. The sort of thing that would be reap the big "wow." with a capital full-stop. It proved that Rei had the capacity to do something as deep as sweatdrop. Yet, she wasn't able to figure out why or how it was.  
Another sweatdrop formed, and rolled away.  
She wasn't able to understand it, then...

The glass doors let in the bright light of the Saturday afternoon sun from outside, briefly blinding in contrast to the KABUKI interior. Rei walked towards the light with the black bag strapped around her, on her shoulder. She was finally about to abandon the KABUKI for a long while after today. The light, outside, seemed to cry out to Rei _Freedom!_ Or was that Rei crying out to it?

Suddenly, something else emerged, flying out from within the dazzling, dense mist of sunlight. It flew through the doors, and right into Rei.  
A pair of bunny ears and a fluffy silhouette was all that could be seen before the collision.

"Kya!"

It sent them both lying on the ground. A few moans of discomfort, and a great effort to get up later, Rei saw what it was that came through those doors. She had to look twice to be sure.

It was a girl in a bunny costume. Much the same as the costume Rei was wearing. She also seemed to be about early senior high school age, much the same as Rei. She had pink, curly hair. She carried a large, paper shopping bag, which laid a distance from either girl. That wasn't the problem, though.  
The girl was Michiko.

Finally, this triggered the name Rei had heard earlier.

"'Micchan'?"

* * *

**Next time**:  
"Micchan" exposed! The two girls come to terms with each other over a cup of coffee! This is a great time to finally escape the bustling of the mall and enjoy the later part of the day before the party. But will Rei get more coffee that she bargained for? And why does Michiko look at Rei in... that way?  
All and more will be revealed in the next, strange chapter: Coffee  
Fan service, anyone...? 

(Send in a review, and the world will suddenly make a lot more sense. That is, for the author... Onegaishimasu!)


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